Ok. It's almost the middle of the year, so I thought I'd go ahead and do a 6 month review of the goals that I set back in January. For those who may not remember, or don't want to go digging, here is a reminder of what my goals for 2014 AKA the Year of Joe are.
1) adjust and live my budget
2) Read 6 nonfiction books by the end of the year
3) TOP SECRET
4) Exercise at least 3 times a week
5) Improve my credit score
Here we go!
1) Adjusting and living my budget.
This has been an interesting one. I had to get a loan in order to fix the fence in my backyard back in December, so this one has actually come in handy and one I've actually done pretty well on. I've come up a bit short the past couple of months due to some additional expenses, and the occasional bad decision. The loan is nearly paid off. I have one more payment, and then I'm done. I've decided in light of the fact I have no real savings account, I'm going to continue to "pay the loan" and transfer that money into an account that I will not be able to easily access. Granted, I need to be able to access it in event of an emergency, so it won't be THAT hard to get access to. With Summer in full swing, and having to turn the AC on, I expect to see an increase in the electric bill but this is something that I had already adjusted the budget for. I'm optimistic that this weakness of mine will soon become a strength.
2) Read 6 nonfiction books by the end of the year.
This goal has been one of the more fun ones that I have set in the past. I love to read, but i've always shied away from the non fictions because I'd almost always find them boring. I decided to remedy that by asking for a few recommendations on my facebook page, and asking friends. I've solidly read 4, maybe 5. I'll have to look. regardless, It's been an amazing journey of learning.
*SHAMLESS PLUG* If you are not aware, LeVar Burton (Kunta Kinte of Roots, Geordi Laforge of Star Trek: The Next Generation) has a Kickstarter project going on aimed at spreading his old PBS television show Reading Rainbow to a new generation and across multiple platforms. This was one of my favorite shows to watch with my Niece when she was a kiddo, and even up until it was taken off of PBS. He's already reached his initial goal, but every bit helps. Check out the Project at the Link below.
https://www.kickstarter.com/projects/readingrainbow/bring-reading-rainbow-back-for-every-child-everywh?ref=home_popular
3) TOP SECRET
Well, I can't really go into details here about this one, but the ball is rolling. I ran into a roadblock, but I'm working my away around it, and hope to have an announcement on this by the end of the summer.
4) Exercise at least 3 times a week
Yeah... The most popular one that EVERYBODY sets. I've got my DVD sets, and I've been cleared medically to do any intensity of workout that I want, but I simply haven't started. I've got a great reason to get it done though.
5) Improve my credit score
This is probably to going to be a long-term, multi year goal. Having the loan that I talked about earlier is going to help a bit, but this is truly going to be an uphill battle. I ran my credit earlier this month, and I'm still waiting on one report to show, but so far there haven't been any nasty surprises yet. At least with this, I will have a solid platform to go on.
I've also decided that in addition to these long term goals, I'm going to set a monthly goal.
The goal for this month? Write something every day. It won't necessarily go on my blog, or on facebook (which doesn't count as writing) but I will certainly share when I feel the need or the inspiration.
So that's the update. Hope you've enjoyed.
Saturday, May 31, 2014
Thursday, March 13, 2014
I'm Stuck!
I've been thinking a lot the past few days which is pretty dangerous. I usually end up getting some hare-brained idea, or come across a question that burns in my mind for a while.
I've noticed a lot of that recently. I've noticed that I tend to fixate on things, and when i do, nothing else really matters. When the object of my fixation (not obsession... obsession is a whole different game for me even thought I know the two words are synonyms.) is a good thing, it's great. Nothing can stop me, I will get whatever is in my way taken care of, no matter the cost. I will bend heaven and earth to make it happen.
However, when the opposite is true, I tend to focus on it. If I feel bad, I tend to pay way close attention to how I am feeling. I fixate on every ache, pain, and feeling of nausea. That usually ends up making things worse. Fortunately, I've noticed this trend, and now I can do something about it.
One of the neat things I learned while I was in the Cognitive Behavior Therapy (CBT) for my Anxiety was using critical thinking to adjust my viewpoint. I forget the term, but maybe one of my psych buddies can refresh me.
For instance... I start to feel anxious, and I notice it. One of the first things that I stop and ask myself is, "Are you in any actual, immediate danger?" If the answer is yes, then I panic and run screaming like everyone else. If not, I take a step back and ask "What is causing the anxiety" and take a minute to think. usually by this time, I aware of what is causing it, and I can start applying effort toward taking that negative thought, and replacing it with something better.
So with my fixations, I'm using much of the same thing. When I start to fixate on something, I look to see if it is a good thing, or not. If it's not, I try and change to focus. Sometimes it is far easier said than done though.
Sorry this has been such a random post, but I find a lot of times if I'm concerned about something, and I write it down, I find an answer. So, thanks for your help!
I've noticed a lot of that recently. I've noticed that I tend to fixate on things, and when i do, nothing else really matters. When the object of my fixation (not obsession... obsession is a whole different game for me even thought I know the two words are synonyms.) is a good thing, it's great. Nothing can stop me, I will get whatever is in my way taken care of, no matter the cost. I will bend heaven and earth to make it happen.
However, when the opposite is true, I tend to focus on it. If I feel bad, I tend to pay way close attention to how I am feeling. I fixate on every ache, pain, and feeling of nausea. That usually ends up making things worse. Fortunately, I've noticed this trend, and now I can do something about it.
One of the neat things I learned while I was in the Cognitive Behavior Therapy (CBT) for my Anxiety was using critical thinking to adjust my viewpoint. I forget the term, but maybe one of my psych buddies can refresh me.
For instance... I start to feel anxious, and I notice it. One of the first things that I stop and ask myself is, "Are you in any actual, immediate danger?" If the answer is yes, then I panic and run screaming like everyone else. If not, I take a step back and ask "What is causing the anxiety" and take a minute to think. usually by this time, I aware of what is causing it, and I can start applying effort toward taking that negative thought, and replacing it with something better.
So with my fixations, I'm using much of the same thing. When I start to fixate on something, I look to see if it is a good thing, or not. If it's not, I try and change to focus. Sometimes it is far easier said than done though.
Sorry this has been such a random post, but I find a lot of times if I'm concerned about something, and I write it down, I find an answer. So, thanks for your help!
Monday, February 17, 2014
Frustration
So I came to the realization the other day that I'm frustrated. On the bright side, the anxiety that typically follows my frustration AKA the Vicious Cycle de Joe is nowhere to be found. In fact, my anxiety for the most part has taken a much needed, and much anticipated break. YES!!
So what am I so frustrated about?
Have you ever gotten the feeling that you're missing something? You look, and you look, and you look some more and you just can't quite put your finger on it? So instead, you think... and you think... and you think... Much like Winnie the Pooh.
Fortunately, I'm not after the Hunny Pot that Pooh loves to think about.
I'm still not sure where I am even going with this post, but I thought that perhaps by writing something down, it might work itself out. Back to the point...
And on to the breakthrough! See? I knew it would work.
Anyone familiar with the term stagnation? Here, look it up.
http://dictionary.reference.com/browse/stagnate?s=t
OR for the ones who don't want to click...
So what am I so frustrated about?
Have you ever gotten the feeling that you're missing something? You look, and you look, and you look some more and you just can't quite put your finger on it? So instead, you think... and you think... and you think... Much like Winnie the Pooh.
Fortunately, I'm not after the Hunny Pot that Pooh loves to think about.
I'm still not sure where I am even going with this post, but I thought that perhaps by writing something down, it might work itself out. Back to the point...
And on to the breakthrough! See? I knew it would work.
Anyone familiar with the term stagnation? Here, look it up.
http://dictionary.reference.com/browse/stagnate?s=t
OR for the ones who don't want to click...
stag·nate [stag-neyt]
verb (used without object), stag·nat·ed, stag·nat·ing.
1. to cease to run or flow, as water, air, etc.
2. to be or become stale or foul from standing, as a pool of water.
3. to stop developing, growing, progressing, or advancing: My mind is stagnating from too much TV.
4. to be or become sluggish and dull: When the leading lady left, the show started to stagnate.
verb (used with object), stag·nat·ed, stag·nat·ing.
Step 1: DONE
I think what I have been feeling is this. Most of the time, I'm a happy go lucky kind of guy. You'll see me smiling, telling jokes and talking to everyone I see. Truthfully, it's exhausting. I'm an introvert, and being social tends to take a lot of my energy. The problem is, by the time I get home from work, I'm so mentally exhausted from being a forced extrovert, that I come in, sit down, eat something, and go into a near vegetative state for a couple of hours. by that time, I'm hungry, so i cook something and eat. Then, I go back into a vegetative state for another hour or so. The whole problem with this is that I spend so much time in that state, that I let things slip. Dishes, cleaning house, other goals, etc.
I set some very realistic goals this year, and I thought perhaps by giving an update, I might be able to break out of the state I am in.
Most of you guys know that I went ahead and bought the P90x3 workout sets with the goal of doing that for my exercise. Unfortunately, I have had to put that on hold for a while while I let my chest heal up. It's been inflamed for who know how long, and been hurting for well over the past month. It's finally getting to the point to where I can work without hurting, so I'm getting there. I've watched all the workouts, and I know that they are well within my range of ability, so i'm honestly looking forward to it.
I've read one of the 6 non-fictions I set out to this year. I'm currently working on a couple. Freakanomics and Bad Science. Both of them have been highly entertaining and I've managed to learn a few things from them both. If you're interested, you can get them...
Living my budget has been a bit on the difficult side. I'm making progress, but I've found that I really do spend way too much money. not much more I can say about that other than it's time to buckle down and make the changes I need to.
Fixing my credit: Well, I'm paying on a loan, and paying extra, so that will hjopefully help. I've decided that after the loan is paid, I will divert those funds to credit repair in a honest effort to fix it.
The top secret goal: Well, It's in the works!
Step 1: DONE
Step 2: DONE
Step 3: In progress
Step 4: Pending
Step 5: Pending
Step 6: Announcement to be made soonish.
So taking a few minutes to look back has actually helped! I'm feeling not so stagnant, as I look and see what I have done so far this year, and it is barely the middle of February!
Thanks for listening guys! Look for another update soon!
Wednesday, February 5, 2014
Ask Joe Anything
So a few weeks ago on my Facebook, I invited all my friends to ask anything they'd like to know about me. I got a few responses, and I have a few answers.
Tammy asked "Hey Joseph. How are you? Well, I want to ask you a question. Hope you don't mind, but I'd like to know, how did you get into writing in the first place? What motivates you to write"
My high school Journalism teacher Marilyn, responded by saying "Writing, with a pen and paper, has amazing therapeutic and healing benefits. Writing with a computer does the same, but not as well."
I'm going to expand on that. Tammy, writing for me has always been an outlet. I've been writing as long as I can remember. It didn't really matter what it was. I've written short stories, game scenarios, and even a few plays in my younger days. I'm not very good at expressing my feelings in speech, and when I write, I'm as brave as anyone could be. I'm not afraid to pull punches, or say something controversial. I've written several things that have won awards. A short story in grade school, a newspaper article, some poetry reviews, and some of my own poetry. I write to escape too. I tend to get lost while I'm writing. The entire world just fades into nothing while I write. it's quite an amazing feeling, and I'm sure you have something that does the same for you. Maybe for you it is drawing.
My sister Ally asked "By the way, I'd like to know why you got a cat. I know you don't have him any more but still, I'd like the thought process behind it. Unless it was all she who shall not be named's idea. Then I won't rub salt into that wound."
The whole reason I got a cat in the first place was because it was "her" idea. "Her" is my ex wife. more on that later. She was working (one of the few times she actually did) and one of her coworkers had to put her Mother into a nursing home. Tiger was only a month old at the time, and the daughter couldn't take care of it. Poor guy was getting attention about once a day, and it wasn't healthy for him. The coworker asked if we could take him, so he wouldn't have to go to the pound. I decided that it would be OK on a trial basis, as I had always been allergic to cats. When we brought him home, I wasn't as allergic as I thought, and he kinda grew on me, so he got to stay until we couldn't take care of him any more and had to consign him to the fates at the pound. Since he's been gone, my allergies, and asthma have been much better. I still miss the fuzzball though.
My friend Carol asked "Joseph, so what about your personal life? Ever been married, or are you still looking for the right lady? Or man? But I never had the feeling you roll that way"
I have to be honest, this one made me chuckle. I was married for nearly 7 years before everything was said and done. It didn't work out, but I'm really grateful for the lessons I learned. I'm much more comfortable in my own skin as a result, and FAR more comfortable talking with the ladies.
What made me chuckle about the question is this is not the first time I've been asked about the possibility of a man being in my life. Yes, I'm far more comfortable around men because I don't have to worry about impressing them. However, I have no desire to be in a relationship with another man. I like the ladies FAR too much for that. :)
No kiddos, but I do have several awesome nieces and one totally rad nephew.
My friend Melissa asked "How did you become my Sancho"
The answer to this, and a bit of history on it. This is kind of an inside joke between Melissa and myself. Melissa was one of my best friends (still is even though i don't see her as much as before) while I was working at Convergys (AKA HELL) and she made many a day far more tolerable than most. One day she said she needed a sugar daddy, and jokingly I said I'd take the job. Ever since then, She has called me Sancho. So that, dear Melissa is how I became your Sancho.
Sorry it has taken me so long to put this together. I've been working on my Top-Secret goal for this year, and it is coming along. There are probably 10 steps to getting this one done, and I've gone through three of them, and working on the fourth. When I'm in a better position to see what the future holds, I will let you all know.
Stay Warm and safe my friends!
If you have any other questions, feel free to drop them on my facebook page!
Tammy asked "Hey Joseph. How are you? Well, I want to ask you a question. Hope you don't mind, but I'd like to know, how did you get into writing in the first place? What motivates you to write"
My high school Journalism teacher Marilyn, responded by saying "Writing, with a pen and paper, has amazing therapeutic and healing benefits. Writing with a computer does the same, but not as well."
I'm going to expand on that. Tammy, writing for me has always been an outlet. I've been writing as long as I can remember. It didn't really matter what it was. I've written short stories, game scenarios, and even a few plays in my younger days. I'm not very good at expressing my feelings in speech, and when I write, I'm as brave as anyone could be. I'm not afraid to pull punches, or say something controversial. I've written several things that have won awards. A short story in grade school, a newspaper article, some poetry reviews, and some of my own poetry. I write to escape too. I tend to get lost while I'm writing. The entire world just fades into nothing while I write. it's quite an amazing feeling, and I'm sure you have something that does the same for you. Maybe for you it is drawing.
My sister Ally asked "By the way, I'd like to know why you got a cat. I know you don't have him any more but still, I'd like the thought process behind it. Unless it was all she who shall not be named's idea. Then I won't rub salt into that wound."
The whole reason I got a cat in the first place was because it was "her" idea. "Her" is my ex wife. more on that later. She was working (one of the few times she actually did) and one of her coworkers had to put her Mother into a nursing home. Tiger was only a month old at the time, and the daughter couldn't take care of it. Poor guy was getting attention about once a day, and it wasn't healthy for him. The coworker asked if we could take him, so he wouldn't have to go to the pound. I decided that it would be OK on a trial basis, as I had always been allergic to cats. When we brought him home, I wasn't as allergic as I thought, and he kinda grew on me, so he got to stay until we couldn't take care of him any more and had to consign him to the fates at the pound. Since he's been gone, my allergies, and asthma have been much better. I still miss the fuzzball though.
My friend Carol asked "Joseph, so what about your personal life? Ever been married, or are you still looking for the right lady? Or man? But I never had the feeling you roll that way"
I have to be honest, this one made me chuckle. I was married for nearly 7 years before everything was said and done. It didn't work out, but I'm really grateful for the lessons I learned. I'm much more comfortable in my own skin as a result, and FAR more comfortable talking with the ladies.
What made me chuckle about the question is this is not the first time I've been asked about the possibility of a man being in my life. Yes, I'm far more comfortable around men because I don't have to worry about impressing them. However, I have no desire to be in a relationship with another man. I like the ladies FAR too much for that. :)
No kiddos, but I do have several awesome nieces and one totally rad nephew.
My friend Melissa asked "How did you become my Sancho"
The answer to this, and a bit of history on it. This is kind of an inside joke between Melissa and myself. Melissa was one of my best friends (still is even though i don't see her as much as before) while I was working at Convergys (AKA HELL) and she made many a day far more tolerable than most. One day she said she needed a sugar daddy, and jokingly I said I'd take the job. Ever since then, She has called me Sancho. So that, dear Melissa is how I became your Sancho.
Sorry it has taken me so long to put this together. I've been working on my Top-Secret goal for this year, and it is coming along. There are probably 10 steps to getting this one done, and I've gone through three of them, and working on the fourth. When I'm in a better position to see what the future holds, I will let you all know.
Stay Warm and safe my friends!
If you have any other questions, feel free to drop them on my facebook page!
Saturday, January 11, 2014
It's the new year!
It's the new year! 2014! 2013 has come and gone. With it, all the good, and all the (thankfully little) bad.
It's time to set new goals, and I thought about setting a goal, to set no goals for a while this year and really think about what I wanted to do this year.
About a week ago, I was spending an evening with a friend of mine, and she asked what I was looking forward to this year, and it really got me thinking. I told her I would have to think about it for a while, and think I did.
Last Monday, I woke up at 3AM in the middle of the night, and couldn't sleep. As I typically do, I started to think. Only this time, I REALLY thought. I thought about the last few years of my life, and how far I've been able to come. I thought about the ones that I've loved, the ones that passed on, and the friends and family I have here. I thought about my challenges with depression and anxiety and realized that I'm doing really well with it. I still have my off days, but that's the thing... They're DAYS and not weeks. When my anxiety acts up, it's typically a really intense flash that lasts about 2-3 minutes.
I was also finally able to get a major source of my anxiety defined over the holidays. I have inflammation of the cartilage in my chest which has been causing the random chest pains in odd places. Now that I have a name, I can fight it, and that has helped immensely in my anxiety fight.
So anyway, i was laying there, thinking about all of this, and I realized that this is going to be MY year. The Year of JOSEPH VERMILLION. Screw the year of the dragon, or whatever it is this year. This is MY year.
So how am I going to make it my year? I decided to set some goals while I lay awake that night. I laid down some big goals, and outlined the smaller ones that I will need to do in order to get the big ones.
Goals:
1) adjust and live my budget
2) Read 6 nonfiction books by the end of the year
3) TOP SECRET
4) Exercise at least 3 times a week
5) Improve my credit score
1) Some of you may recall that last year, I decided I wanted to live by a budget and save some money. Well, I have a budget... but I didn't quite live it. So this year, I'm buckling down and adjusting it and living it. I'm using Mint.com which is doneby the guys who run Quicken Loans, and it has a handy mobile app that lets me see exactly what and where my money is going.
2) I decided that I want to read more non-fiction this year. I want to spread out a bit as I typically read fiction/fantasy/sci-fi/Star Wars books. I decided on 6 as that will allow me two months to finish one book. I've already got a fantastic list of books picked out, so it is going to be a fun year in reading.
3) TOP SECRET : Well, as it says, this one is top secret. i don't want o jinx it, but there are three our four steps that I'm having to take to get it going. Those have been written down and are in my safe keeping. When I'm ready, this goal will be revealed. No, I'm not getting married anytime soon, so don't even worry about that!
4) exercise at least 3 times a week. I'm taking a serious look at the p90x3 set. The biggest thing that held me back from doing the original P90X was the length of the program... Most of them ran at around an hour. I have a hard time focusing on anything that isn't fun for that long, so the shorter format is really appealing to me. I already have a gym membership that I'm thinking of canceling if this new format works out for me.
5) I guess this one ties into goal number 1. When I got the loan to fix my fence, i found out my credit score is a little less than average. I also found some things on my credit report that shouldn't have been there, so I'm in the process of getting those fixed.
I have a really good feeling about my goals this year, and I feel that I'm going to be stretched the most by numbers 1, 3 and 4 the most.
It's going to be a great year. The YEAR OF JOE!
It's time to set new goals, and I thought about setting a goal, to set no goals for a while this year and really think about what I wanted to do this year.
About a week ago, I was spending an evening with a friend of mine, and she asked what I was looking forward to this year, and it really got me thinking. I told her I would have to think about it for a while, and think I did.
Last Monday, I woke up at 3AM in the middle of the night, and couldn't sleep. As I typically do, I started to think. Only this time, I REALLY thought. I thought about the last few years of my life, and how far I've been able to come. I thought about the ones that I've loved, the ones that passed on, and the friends and family I have here. I thought about my challenges with depression and anxiety and realized that I'm doing really well with it. I still have my off days, but that's the thing... They're DAYS and not weeks. When my anxiety acts up, it's typically a really intense flash that lasts about 2-3 minutes.
I was also finally able to get a major source of my anxiety defined over the holidays. I have inflammation of the cartilage in my chest which has been causing the random chest pains in odd places. Now that I have a name, I can fight it, and that has helped immensely in my anxiety fight.
So anyway, i was laying there, thinking about all of this, and I realized that this is going to be MY year. The Year of JOSEPH VERMILLION. Screw the year of the dragon, or whatever it is this year. This is MY year.
So how am I going to make it my year? I decided to set some goals while I lay awake that night. I laid down some big goals, and outlined the smaller ones that I will need to do in order to get the big ones.
Goals:
1) adjust and live my budget
2) Read 6 nonfiction books by the end of the year
3) TOP SECRET
4) Exercise at least 3 times a week
5) Improve my credit score
1) Some of you may recall that last year, I decided I wanted to live by a budget and save some money. Well, I have a budget... but I didn't quite live it. So this year, I'm buckling down and adjusting it and living it. I'm using Mint.com which is doneby the guys who run Quicken Loans, and it has a handy mobile app that lets me see exactly what and where my money is going.
2) I decided that I want to read more non-fiction this year. I want to spread out a bit as I typically read fiction/fantasy/sci-fi/Star Wars books. I decided on 6 as that will allow me two months to finish one book. I've already got a fantastic list of books picked out, so it is going to be a fun year in reading.
3) TOP SECRET : Well, as it says, this one is top secret. i don't want o jinx it, but there are three our four steps that I'm having to take to get it going. Those have been written down and are in my safe keeping. When I'm ready, this goal will be revealed. No, I'm not getting married anytime soon, so don't even worry about that!
4) exercise at least 3 times a week. I'm taking a serious look at the p90x3 set. The biggest thing that held me back from doing the original P90X was the length of the program... Most of them ran at around an hour. I have a hard time focusing on anything that isn't fun for that long, so the shorter format is really appealing to me. I already have a gym membership that I'm thinking of canceling if this new format works out for me.
5) I guess this one ties into goal number 1. When I got the loan to fix my fence, i found out my credit score is a little less than average. I also found some things on my credit report that shouldn't have been there, so I'm in the process of getting those fixed.
I have a really good feeling about my goals this year, and I feel that I'm going to be stretched the most by numbers 1, 3 and 4 the most.
It's going to be a great year. The YEAR OF JOE!
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