Risks

One of the biggest regrets I have in and about my life is that I don't take too many risks.

I tend to stay in my comfort zone, where I know I'm safe and I won't be hurt by anyone or anything else. I tend to blame this a little bit on my background.

Most of you know (or will know in about two seconds) that I'm what's commonly referred to as a Military brat. My Dad was in the military and because of that, I've Moved around A LOT. Typically we wouldn't stay in one area more than 3-5 years before having to pack up and move on. Sometimes it was shorter and never longer.

Beign a military child tends to do one of two things for your personality. You're either an outgoing person who loves to meet new people, the life of the party, etc... or You're more like me. I don't do very well with social situations. I tend to be more quiet (I know, unreal huh?) and reserved than some of my siblings and those around me.

Like I said, I don't normally like to take risks. Take for instance this. Normally, when I like a girl I kind of hang off to the side, check her out, plan my attack and smile. I never take that first step because I'm morbidly afraid of making an ass out of myself and being laughed at. (More to come on that subject in a later entry) Then, when said person moves on, I get upset and frustrated that I never took the time and stepped up and let them know how I feel. I cannot count the number of times that I've done this and for the most part, I feel horrible. I always promise myself that the next time that situation arises, I'd take the bull by the horns and just blurt it out so to speak. Most of the time however, I end up running willy nilly in front of said bull trying to not get gored and trampled. More often than not I end up broken, bruised and bleeding on the side of the street. All because I'm afraid to take risks.

Now, there have been some times when i have gone out on a limb and taken some risks and it's paid of big time. the most recent of these was when i applied for the position I'm currently working at. I hated where I was, wanted out, but again... here goes the worrying  about the bull... Would I be trampled before I even got out the door?

Thanks to the helpful prodding of a couple of friends I prepared my resume and applied for the job. In the long run, the risk was far less than it appeared to be looking from the other side. The rewards however, have been fantastic. I love what I'm doing. My health has improved, I feel better about life in general.

I guess what I'm saying is, perhaps it is time to take more risks.

"Life is not tried, It's merely survived if you're standing outside the fire." --Garth Brooks